Not a day goes by that I don't quote a specific line of dialogue from Dr. Strangelove. It comes from the scene where General Turgidson is explaining to the President that General Ripper has sent his bombers to attack Russia. He reads a message from Ripper that ends with a reference to precious bodily fluids. Turgidson comments to the effect that "we are still trying to figure out what that means." The President's reply is my current favorite line from a film, and my guide to surviving in a crazy world. Says he, "There's nothing to figure out. The man is clearly a psychotic!"
Every day, either I, or the people around me, or the press, or the governemnt, is "trying to figure out" why someone has behaved in a manner that directly goes against common sense and their own best interests. For years I would join in the analysis, delving into matters of passion, psychology, philosophy, etc. But no more. Now, I end all such conversations very quickly by saying, "There's nothing to figure out. [Fill in name] is clearly a psychotic."
Once you adopt this simple guide to understanding the behavior of others, your life becomes so simple. In fact, it is particularly useful in matters dealing with the relations between the sexes. Consider the amount of time spent by men trying to figure out why women act the way they do. Meanwhile, the answer is clear. (Ok, gals, I was just kidding. I'm sure the formula works just as well for women who want to analyze the actions of men. However, being male, I can't help but feel that it has greater resonance when pointed toward the distaff half.)
Anyway, please try it out for yourself at the earliest opportunity. You will be amazed and gratified at how incredibly wise you sound, and your friends and family will hail you as a genius. As soon as anyone starts in with that same old litany, "oh, did you hear about so and so, and what he did, now why did blah blah,..." cut them off immediately "There's nothing to figure out. The man is clearly....
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Very interesting. I took your advice and I used this quote and I think you'll be intrigued to here it not only works for men and women, but for animals. My mother asked me why my dog insisted on running around the house at full speed after he ate dinner and I promptly responded with, "There's nothing to figure out, our dog is clearly psychotic". She laughed, and the conversation ended.
ReplyDeleteLOL! (And you should know that never use that hackneyed expression, if one can call it that, unless I am actually laughing out loud.)
ReplyDeleteThat's very funny Nick, and interesting analysis Mr. Bennett. I'm sorry I've have been around on the blog in a very long time but I've been at College Orientation the past 4 days and had to get all the stuff ready for it before then, but now that I'm settled in, I might be able to start posting here and there. I'll be sure to try and use this expression around campus as classes start tomorrow. And don't worry I haven't stopped watching movies, and some thoughts on something will go up on here soon. Look out!
ReplyDeleteI'm glad to hear that Jimmy. I've missed your opinions about movies. They were very intriguing during school. I myself am barely able to stay in the swing of things with my own preparations for college.
ReplyDelete